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July 23, 2004

Sometimes bad prose is on purpose

Hard as it may be to believe, not all awful writing is the result of authors whose manuscripts fall through the cracks of publishers with editors that should know better or the product of authors who peddle strange theological tracts masquerading as books to a captive audience. Sometimes, if you want to create some bad writing, you need to try really hard.

The results of 2004's Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest are finally here. This is the contest to see who can form the worst opening passage for a novel, named for Victorian novelist Edward George Earl Bulwer-Lytton who coined "It was a dark and stormy night."

One of my favorites:

Maynard Fimble was told that "you can't compare apples and oranges," but, he thought, they are both eatable, grow on trees, are about the same size, are good for you, have a peel, come in many varieties, and are approximately round in shape, thus, to his horror and guilt, he realized that he was comparing them and wondered what punishment awaited him and on whose order.

Of course, as the saying goes, to really foul things up requires a computer.

Posted by Dean at July 23, 2004 12:28 AM

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I really, really enjoyed this. The humor works brilliantly, and the animation is much better than I had imagined. The way you have “blended” (hehe) it all together makes this look like a solid, whole product, as good as any Pixar short. Probably better. But then again: That’s my opinion.
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